Co-parenting.....oh the joys! This has been a hot topic on my Facebook newsfeed lately. I think anyone that has to co-parent doesn't enjoy it. It can be very difficult and a huge struggle. Some people are great at it and I envy those people. Some people wish they could parent alone instead of having to co-parent and I have been right there with you. Over the past almost five years my co-parenting style has definitely evolved. Right now it is somewhat non-existent and that is just the way I like it.
I have decided that Mason's father can choose how much involvement he wants in Mason's life but I am not going to go out of my way to force it on him. The door is always open to call Mason whenever he wants and to come to Mason's activities. Even though that door is open.....he rarely uses it. I inform him of the things that I am legally required to notify him about and he will text me randomly every once in awhile to see how Mason is doing but that is as far as the communication goes. When there is no communication there is no fighting so that is the way I like it. I definitely don't think this is the best way to co-parent but this is what works best for my situation.
I also give Mason's father the choice financially. Mason's father is required by the state to pay child support which comes straight out of his paycheck. Also in our parenting agreement he is supposed to pay half of all medical and daycare bills. I have given him this option as well. Getting him to reimburse me for these bills is like pulling teeth. I no longer tell him when I pay for Mason to go to daycare. It is not worth it. He chooses not to help pay for preschool. I send him pictures of Mason's eye doctor bills, the health clinic mails him a copy of Mason's doctor bills and I leave it at that. If he wants to pay me great but it is not worth the headache trying to get money out of him.
Mason goes to his fathers every other weekend and I will continue to take him as long as he wants to go. I think it is very important that he knows his other side of his family. The biggest struggle I have with co-parenting is that Mason's father and I have very different morals and values. We are such different people that we don't see eye to eye. This is something that I know I will have to deal with forever. I know that all I can do is raise Mason in a stable home and instill in him morals and values. I can only raise him the best that I can and it does no good to stress about what I cannot control. The only thing I can do is pray.....a lot! Mason learned at a very young age that the rules at our house and his father's house are very different. It can be very confusing for a child so he is still learning this the older he gets.
I am praying for all of you that have to co-parent. All you can do is what is best for your child and try to make the best life possible out of it. I don't know that it ever gets easy but have hope that it will get better.
I have decided that Mason's father can choose how much involvement he wants in Mason's life but I am not going to go out of my way to force it on him. The door is always open to call Mason whenever he wants and to come to Mason's activities. Even though that door is open.....he rarely uses it. I inform him of the things that I am legally required to notify him about and he will text me randomly every once in awhile to see how Mason is doing but that is as far as the communication goes. When there is no communication there is no fighting so that is the way I like it. I definitely don't think this is the best way to co-parent but this is what works best for my situation.
I also give Mason's father the choice financially. Mason's father is required by the state to pay child support which comes straight out of his paycheck. Also in our parenting agreement he is supposed to pay half of all medical and daycare bills. I have given him this option as well. Getting him to reimburse me for these bills is like pulling teeth. I no longer tell him when I pay for Mason to go to daycare. It is not worth it. He chooses not to help pay for preschool. I send him pictures of Mason's eye doctor bills, the health clinic mails him a copy of Mason's doctor bills and I leave it at that. If he wants to pay me great but it is not worth the headache trying to get money out of him.
Mason goes to his fathers every other weekend and I will continue to take him as long as he wants to go. I think it is very important that he knows his other side of his family. The biggest struggle I have with co-parenting is that Mason's father and I have very different morals and values. We are such different people that we don't see eye to eye. This is something that I know I will have to deal with forever. I know that all I can do is raise Mason in a stable home and instill in him morals and values. I can only raise him the best that I can and it does no good to stress about what I cannot control. The only thing I can do is pray.....a lot! Mason learned at a very young age that the rules at our house and his father's house are very different. It can be very confusing for a child so he is still learning this the older he gets.
I am praying for all of you that have to co-parent. All you can do is what is best for your child and try to make the best life possible out of it. I don't know that it ever gets easy but have hope that it will get better.
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